Happy Mother’s Day, Mama! 献给妈妈的信

It’s my 9th Mother’s Day celebration for remembering I am a mum. To be frank, I have never thought of it as a celebration for me. Maybe I am still feeling like a little girl in my heart and the “girl girl” to my dad and mum. So, each Mother’s Day, I see it as a day of significance to let my mum know that she has a place deep in our hearts.

My mum is a woman of steel. She is our strong pillar at home and we often go to her for solutions and advice even till now. She never let my dad worry about any problems raising us up. I am not sure how she did it, but it seemed easy to her to handle 3 kids 11 hours on her own without help while my dad worked 6 days a week. She was good in handling the 3 of us and we grew up to be responsible, upright and men/woman of integrity. She was strict and had her unique ways to discipline us and she often used the cane. Those were the days when I hid under the bed and still got the sweeping strokes from the cane as she swept it under the bed to make sure I was punished. It was loud wails then but a good joke to my kids now who always bring this up to laugh at their mummy.

When we had gotten the bad bug of blinking our eyes hard more than 10 times every minute, she taped a needle at our eyelids to kick the bad habit. Weird habits to do with the mouth? She used chilli to rub our lips. Anything to do with the ears? She would decorate our ears with clothes pegs. Abusive you might say, but she did these to us with the heart of making us shed undesirable habits. Anyway, they all worked and we escaped unscathed by the punishments.

She was a home maker and I loved to see her greet me at the door when I returned home from school. I cannot imagine returning to an empty house after school and I will ensure that will never happened to my young kids. We always had warm food on the table and she would always sit with us at the dining table to chat with us even if she was not eating. Those were the times when she would listen to our woes, happenings in school, knew who were our friends and teachers and everything except boy-girl relationship which I knew better to hide from her. But I know she knew whenever I liked someone or someone liked me. Nothing escaped her and the best part was, she did not give long lectures. She just kept her eyes and ears opened wide and only gave warnings to me if she found something’s fishy or not right.

Now, I am a mum myself, I start to reflect on what she had done and how she did what she did when we were young. She is a smart lady and knows when to pull the strings and when to let go when needed. She was liberal and gave us freedom to grow up. She was certainly no helicopter parent but yet she knew everything about us. Her parenting style influenced me greatly in how I bring up my kids. In fact, whenever I face problems in disciplining my children, she comes to mind instantly and I would think of how she would handle in my shoes and I learn from there. She influenced me so much that even during the painful childbirth, my thoughts were on how she could handle the pain of delivering all 3 of us naturally without epidural and these thoughts helped me to do the same when I delivered my own 3 kids. The thought of “If my mum could do this naturally and endured the pain, I could too!” was probably more effective than the laughing gas could to withstand the pain of childbirth.

I do not think she knew how much I admire her and how much she influenced me in endless positive ways. I want her to know now. On most of the Mother’s Day, I never fail to give her a bouquet of flowers. This year is no exception, but I have added a gift which I think will make her cry. I wrote a letter to her in Chinese, a touching letter that expresses my deepest emotions and gratitude to her. It’s been quite a while since I last wrote my diary in Chinese. It was not too bad though. Here’s the edited version minus too much tears 🙂

Mama, I love you with all my heart! Happy Mother’s Day!

亲爱的妈妈,

我有个心爱的妈妈。无时无刻呵护着我的妈妈。不停牵挂着我的妈妈。非常疼惜我的妈妈。这个人就是您。

小时候, 尽管家境不佳, 您和爸爸从没让我们感觉到一丝的不满足。或许是您们教导得好, 我们兄妹三人很满足于虽平淡但快乐温暖的小康之家。我们从不觉得缺少了物质的享受而不快乐, 也懂得明白为何不能拥有贵重的玩具。我们在您和爸爸的严厉教导与细心灌溉下逐渐成长。

每当我放学回家,最开心的是看见您在家中等我回来。您总是替我添饭,帮我拿筷子,然后坐在饭桌看着我吃饭和听我叙述学校发生的点点滴滴。我很享受有妈妈在旁陪伴的感觉。我喜欢能在您的面前畅所欲言,滔滔不绝地说出生活点滴与心里感受。至今仍然一样。每当我遇到难题和困扰,您总能看得出我有心事, 然后赐给我金玉良言, 教我许多做人的道理。我们之间有着许多的默契, 往往不必多说, 都知道彼此心理在想什么。任何事总是瞒不了您也难不倒您。

身为人母后, 我经常回想小时候您如何教导我们。很多时候,当我因教导子女碰到困惑时,我总会想起您是如何处理难题。您对我的影响力是您所无法想象的大。我也非常感激您给予的教诲。我会铭记在心。

您和爸爸虽然没念很多书,但却能让我们在没有补习下获得优异的成绩,读完大学。从中学的叛逆期至现在为人妻母,我都让您操心不少。我很感激您和爸爸这么爱我。只要我拥有您们的爱,我就感到很安全,很幸福。

现在每当我看着女儿上校车后频频向我挥手的一幕就仿佛看见自己小时向着年轻的您挥手一样。非常温馨。就是这种爱的感觉引导我如何做个好妈妈, 如何给予孩子们无私的爱。谢谢您和爸爸含心茹苦把我们抚养长大。有您们这样棒的父母让我感觉无比的幸福。我从来没对您说出我有多爱您。这些感言献给您也献给爸爸。谢谢您妈妈。谢谢您爸爸。我会好好地回报您和爸爸,让您们快乐。我要多陪您们,尽我所能带您们享受人生。我会常常陪伴在您们身边。

妈妈,我爱您。您是我永远的好妈妈。

母亲节快乐。

Mothers day

13 thoughts on “Happy Mother’s Day, Mama! 献给妈妈的信”

  1. It’s a touching letter. I am sure your mum will really very happy after received this. This year I also write a small note to my mum about my feeling to her. Additional thing that I had done to her this Mother’s Day is that I hug her and kiss her which I have never done to her before. I can see her face is very happy. Always appreciate and love them when they are still around.

    1. You are so “brave” to hug and kiss your mum! That would have given me more courage than to write this letter. We know our mums will be happy even though they do not say it out. That’s Asian parents. Yes, we should really appreciate them and show they love when they are still able to hear us 🙂 Happy Mother’s Day to you!

  2. I love that you write you survived those unusual “punishments”. As parents we use the best tools we have at our disposal and what some consider abusive today were standard tools at one time. Your Mom sounds like a great person and she did a great job with you.

  3. She sounds like a very traditional mother! Your respect is quite obvious, and beautiful.

    You know we do hear a lot about harsh disciplinary techniques and at the risk of getting into that debate… I think there’s a lot more to it than whether you do or do not smack. Kids pick up on the intention behind your actions or inaction – whether you smack or not is less important, I think, than whether you care. Not caring, whether that comes with or without hitting, seems to be the real downfall, and on the other hand a lot is forgiven when the parent does care. (That all said, we are on an anti-yell campaign in our house at the moment…)

    1. Oh you say it so rightly! It’s really the caring that is important smacking or not. Luckily it is not a crime to smack in Singapore. I am certainly yeling more nowadays with the exams this week. More to that in another post I think. I am trying hard not to yell too, but it gets on my nerves so much, I have to walk out of the room many times to cool myself. So, please share about your anti-yelling campaign! I need that!

  4. I love that you write so highly of your mom. I, too, often think of what my mom would do when I come to a parenting situation, and her actions in my past greatly influence whether I will or won’t do something. Happy Mother’s Day!

  5. Thanks! I think that applies to our kids. They will remember how we teach them and influence their actions in future. That sounds such a great responsibility on myself now. Happy Mother’s Day!

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