Category: Baby Diaries

Baby’s milestones

Baby Number 3

Finally, the dreaded morning sickness is more or less gone.

My belly is manageable, appetite back to normal, energy back to usual, still can fit into 1/3 of my normal size clothes, can walk fast without waddling like a penguin, but nose power is still around and few pimples still popping out.  I can play with my kids as I used to without feeling extremely cold in an air-conditioned room, without feeling nauseous, and can do some simple household chores (Kel must be secretly glad the dishes portion is taken half from him for now).  Sleep wise is a little disruptive though, with my bladder calling several times in the night, sometimes every hour!  And there is almost only one sleep position that I can stick to for the whole night, that is sleeping on my left (which is the best position for the baby).  No more sleeping on tummy and even on my back.  Still, I would say 2nd trimester is the best time in pregnancy!

XX and YH are looking forward to their baby sibling.  They pass me by and will often stop to plant a kiss on my belly.  They greet the baby with a simple “hello” and kiss again.  It’s so sweet.  The last pregnancy was when XX was one and a half year old and she did the same too.  What a perfect picture of love.

This pregnancy seems to be more of an educational one for my little ones.  And in a way, more like a gift for them.  I had always wanted 3 kids simply because I grew up with 2 older brothers happily.  1 is no-no for fear of being too self-centred, 2 is somewhat not enough as they only have each other for company, 3 is just nice and makes “family of five” sounds good!

Like all my previous pregnancy, I will tell my baby that Mummy and Daddy will definitely give you lots of love and a loving family to grow up in.  That’s our pledge dear baby.  We love you.

The dreaded MORNING SICKNESS

Morning sickness truly brings out a woman’s contradicting behaviour to the ultimate.
1. I feel sick to the core and nothing can make me feel better.
2. I feel very hungry without warning, yet I have no appetite.
3. I totally do not feel like eating, yet my mind is constantly thinking of what food would make you feel better.
4. My nose power is better than animals. I can smell oily fried food from miles away. And that makes me puke.
5. Everyday at 430pm, I dread the smell of coffee my colleague will make a cuppa for his tea break.
6. Everyday I pass by my favourite bread shop, I will use my mouth to breathe simply because I find the supposedly fragrant a trigger for throwing up. I could no longer walk into that shop.
7. I crave for porridge, yet after eating my favourite hongkong porridge from my favourite restaurant, I now boycott it.
8. All food that I like became food I avoid now. That means I hate crabs and sotong (squid) now.
9. I can’t go near unwashed dishes as I must avoid smell of food.
10. Every dinner, I have to throw up first before I can eat a tiny portion of rice which is even less than what my kids are eating.

Those who do not have morning sickness are really really lucky. Everyday I am counting down to the end of this first trimester and hoping I can find back my normal appetite and energy come the 2nd trimester. My kids have been neglected as my battery is always in dangerous beeping mode every evening. I could at most read a story to them on my bed. And I have to read to them in a stuffy room because I am scared of cold. I could have worn my winter jacket to sleep with no fan and still pile up with my blanket. What am I becoming to? What makes it worse is I have so much gas inside me, I burp non-stop. I can’t burp too loud in public so when I am back home, I am a terrible “Burping Monster” with no image concern!

This post was really written on the train one morning when I was surprisingly feeling quite alright, and continued weeks later on another night which is today, when I feel unusually better than normal nights.  I could no longer function normally and all my favourite things like blogging, has been cast aside for some time.

I am waiting for the start of the enjoyment of my 3rd and probably last pregnancy.  Right now, I am simply too tired and unwell to even remember how life was in normal mode.  Let me quickly enjoy the process of seeing my belly getting bigger by the day and feeling extremely motherly loving to my little one inside, yes, minus the morning sickness memory.

10 Top Things To Get For Preparation of Your Newborn

Apart from the usual cot, milk bottles, nappies, booties, here are 10 things that I feel are a MUST to be well-prepared for your newborn’s arrival.

1. A cot or a playpen?

Most people have both but some people prefers the dual function of a playpen or even a cot.  I see the difference of a cot and playpen as below:
a) cot is for sleeping (the base is a solid piece) and playpen is for playing (the base has more cushioning effect and does not provide a good sleep support)
b) cot is made of wooden frame and playpen is made with fabric (better cushioning effect when baby becomes toddler and starts to bump around in the playpen)
c) cot is better ventilated since it has openings at all sides in between each wooden structure and playpen is less ventilated since it is covered with fabric on all 4 sides

My personal preference is to have both cot and playpen to serve different purpose.  Most people can get hands-me-down for these 2 bulky baby items as many would be delighted to give them away to clear some space in their homes.

2. Sterilized cotton balls

Do not buy just normal cotton balls.  Buy sterilized ones.
As newborn needs extra care for hygiene, sterilized cotton balls would be very useful for:
a) cleaning the areola before breastfeeding
b) cleaning your newborn’s eyes, ears and mouth
c) cleaning the belly button with umbilical cord still attached for the first days

3. Sterilizer for bottles

An electric steam sterilizer is useful compared to the traditional method of sterilizing in boiling water.  This is especially so when you need to sterilize your bottles and breast pumps in the middle of the night.  You wouldn’t want to stay and wait till the water boils, apparatus sterilized for a further 5-10 minutes before you can turn off the stove and go back to bed.

4. Baby sling

Baby sling is very useful for carrying the baby wherever you go, be it at home or out shopping with your girl friends.  I prefer it to stroller as it is so convenient to travel around and climb the stairs.  I find it useful even when doing housework or shopping for groceries.  The baby feels safe in your arms close to you, smelling you and is not so easily frightened.  You have your free hands to do what you want to do.  It protects your privacy as you breastfeed your baby in public too.  I would say this is certainly worth an investment.  One tricky part though, is to learn how to use the sling comfortably.

5. A good diaper bag

A good carry-on bag to put baby essentials would be your best “helper”. Get one that has many compartments, big and small, to organize the bottles, diapers, wash cloth, baby bites, nappy cream, etc.

6. Baby wash cloth/hanky

You will need lots of these. These are useful and inexpensive. They are used as “napkins” during feeding and burping, to wipe off saliva and milk stains. They are useful as breast pads at home!

7. Baby wipes

Baby wipes are great for its multi-purpose usage. You can get 2 kinds of baby wipes. One for nappy change and one for wiping hands and mouth. However, I prefer using a wet hanky for wiping mouth and hands during the first 2 months since babies are so sensitive to external products on their skin. Besides using the wipes on the baby, I use them to wipe high chairs, cutlery and cups when I go out dining with my children too.

8. PIGEON baby food grinder bowl with spoon

I love this product from PIGEON.  It is a transparent egg shape bowl with small grinding beads that jut out slightly on the base.  The spoon that comes with it compliments the grinding beads to mash food easily.  The spoon can be snapped back onto the yellow lid and it’s really great for taking outdoors for feeding your baby with baby food.  I have seen other baby brands imitating this product, but PIGEON makes it with better design and touch.

9. Bottle holder

This is another favourite product from PIGEON.  It is useful to carry warm water in milk bottles for going out.  In fact, I do not like to carry vacuum flask, so what I usually do is to fill up with hot water in the milk bottle with the baby feeding timing in mind. Then the bottle holder is able to keep the water to lukewarm by about 3 hours for me to prepare formula milk for the baby.  This bottle holder comes in double holder where you can put 2 bottles and even AVENT bottles which are big can fit in.  Hence, it doubles up as a storage for expressed breastmilk in AVENT bottles for me.  I just need to add some ice-cubes on the extra space on top to maintain the cold expressed breastmilk.  Simple, no hassle and no need for expensive warmer bags.

10. Boiled Cool Water

I feel that I need to mention this as one of the top 10 things.  The best part is this is easily available in your kitchen.  Boiled water that has been cooled can be used to treat several skin problems at least for the milder cases I encountered with my babies.  I used it for washing my babies’ bottoms with each diaper change coupled with my favourite brand DESITIN nappy cream.  I used it for treating milk stain rash on the face and heat rash too.  It seems to work better than tap water especially for newborns.  Since it’s a cheap solution, you can give it a try!

What other things would you consider a MUST GET for preparing for your newborn arrival?  Share with me!

10 Top Questions Posed by Mums-to-be

Being one of the first to be a mum among my friends, it just seems natural that those close friends of mine would seek my advice on parenting.  And I really enjoy giving my two-cents worth to them while I indulge in reminiscence of my own pregnancy.  The best part is I have 2 to share.
Hence I have consolidated the top 10 questions and my advice to help future mums-to-be or even 2nd-time mums.

1. Breastmilk or formula?

I would say it depends on your milk supply and how tired you are during the first confinement month. Breastmilk is naturally the best milk for your baby.  You must have heard all the good reasons everywhere. But if breastfeeding is going to have you compromise your well-being and good rest, and if you find yourself taking it on the baby and everyone else including yourself, then please mix the feeding  routine with some formula milk. After that, slowly establish your breastmilk supply.  You may be wondering: is breastfeeding so tiring?

2. Establishing Breastfeeding

You love to breastfeed your baby, but your milk supply is so slow and low in the first few days, you feel upset, and feel like giving up.  This is natural as you would have read in the books as well.  In my experience, my milk supply was only established 2 weeks after birth.  What is establishing breastfeeding?  It means to have a constant sufficient supply of breastmilk for your baby.  There are many ways to increase the milk supply, like drinking lots of fluids, drink lots of soup, masssaging your breasts, have a relax body, think positively, think of the baby sucking on your breasts, drinking hot fluid before breastfeeding or expressing milk and correct baby position of latching on to your breasts.  Most importantly, you have to breastfeed or express the milk round the clock with about 3-4 hours interval including night hours.  With good planning, you can decide for yourself when you want to breastfeed directly and when you want to express the milk for bottle feeds.  Bottle feeds have the advantage of giving you more rest while someone is taking over the feeding, burping and putting the baby back to sleep which can really take up precious rest time and energy.

3. Does my baby need to drink water?

You may have read in many parenting books that if your baby is breastfed, you need not give any water to him/her.  This may be in contrast to grandparents who think that drinking water is important for the baby.  But newborn babies seem to be easily choked on water.  My experience was to give a teaspoon full of gripe water mix with 100ml of water in a bottle.  That usually stops the choking stress and gripe water can soothe colic and any tummy discomfort.  Then again, some mothers may not agree to give other kinds of fluid apart from milk and water.  So, it all depends on your school of thought.

4. What food should I be avoiding?

Foods that are harmful for the baby should be avoided like coffee and tea which have caffeine.  You should continue on the good nutrition that you have been observing throughout pregnancy and continue to take multi-vitamins.  Foods that will cause colic for the baby for breastfeeding mothers should be avoided too.  These food include onions, peanuts, nuts, spice foods, cabbage and dairy products.  To eliminate dairy products from our diet is rather difficult.  Hence, moderation is the word.  And even though milk is one of the culprit, I would still advise mothers to drink milk to replenish the depleted calcium due to pregnancy.

5. Can I bathe and wash my hair?

This question is more for Asians.  We believe that during the month of confinement, i.e. the first month after delivery, the mother is weak and should not touch water and anything that is cold including air-conditioning in the room.  Mothers cannot bathe, cannot wash their hair, cannot have fan blowing directly at them, cannot sleep in air-conditioning room.  Over the years, this has changed very much.  Even though many new mothers do not believe in such tradition in these modern times, they would still follow to a certain extent “just in case” the belief that ailments would follow through the later part of their lives if they fail to adhere may come true.  After all, in these days where many women may only give birth once or twice in their life, it is better to be safe than sorry.
For me, I insisted till around day 12 to bathe and wash my oily and sticky hair.  This was before I had to visit my gynae for post-delivery check-up.  I certainly would be greatly embarassed if my gynae and nurses were to smell me from afar.  Even the process of bathing has to be well-taken care of.  All doors and windows should be shut tight.  And a warm half-glass of D.O.M would be waiting for me outside the bathroom.  You can have a full glass if you like the taste, but not for me.  The bath has been prepared with special herbs believed to get rid of any “wind”.  The bathing time has to be short, like 5 minutes.  Then once I was done, I had to take care to dry myself very thoroughly inside the bathroom, changed into my new clothes, stepped out of the bathroom quickly and drink my glass of D.O.M to warm my body.  After that, quickly blew dry my hair.  Throughout the confinement month, I managed to bathe only thrice.  This is nothing compared to some who only bathe after 1 month!
On days that I could not bathe, I had to take care of my hygiene well, and changed into new set of clothes 2 times a day.  I used a small towel to clean myself behind closed doors and windows.  For my hair, I washed using dry shampoo which is a kind of powder form that you apply through your hair.  It helps to make it less sticky and oily which is better than nothing.

6. Will I spoil my child if I carry him too frequently?

I know of many friends who insisted not to carry their child too often just to prevent the child from getting used to being carried around and not able to be tamed if put down.  I once read on a book where the women of a certain tribe carried their newborn on them till the baby is 6 months old!  All the while without leaving the baby from the arms at all.  The baby can be rotated around to be carried by anyone but not allowed to be put down.  This is believed to increase bonding and boost immunity of the baby.  Unbelievable!  I kind of love this practice.  I love to carry my baby.  In fact I love to carry my baby around when I go about doing housework, and talk to my baby non-stop about the mundane household chores.  I believe that this is the time that my baby wants me to carry him/her.  How long can you enjoy this bonding?  Before you know, they would have grown up and may not even want you to carry them anymore.

7. Sibling rivalry

This question is definitely at the top of the mind for 2nd-time mums and dads.  I started telling my girl about having a baby sibling after my first check-up with my gynae.  On and off, we would mention the upcoming fun of having a new family member.  I avoided the mentioning of the gender before it was confirmed.  We involved her in most of the preparation for the arrival of the baby.  And when the big day came, I was greatly touched by the look of my girl’s gaze at her newborn brother.  It was full of amaze mixed with delight and even some hints of unbelievable look.  She must be overwhelmed by the sight of the baby after picturing in her mind for so many months looking at my growing tummy.  It was certainly a look that I still remember fondly up till this day.
After my baby YH was brought back home, I tried not to disrupt the bedtime routine with my girl as much as possible.  I talked to her, cuddled her, reassured her that she was and will always be my lovely precious princess.  In fact, we did what friends and books advised: to prepare 2 sets of presents to be given to the siblings in a present exchange “ceremony”.  Things work out well for us.  As long as the older sibling’s normal routine does not have drastic change and you and your spouse set aside time for him/her, sibling rivalry should be minimal.

8. Will I be ever get to wear back my old clothes?

Give yourself 4 months.  At the end of 4 months, you should be able to wear most of your old clothes.  Pants may be abit tight though since the hip does expand after childbirth.  You will be rewarded with faster weight loss if you are breastfeeding.  You should not go on a diet at all.  After childbirth and during breastfeeding months, mothers should be eating nutritious food.  Getting good nutrition should be top priority over getting back into shape.  You should be doing some light exercises regularly to help shed off some kilos and better well-being.

9. How to be sane with all the time and energy put into taking care of the baby?

Get out of the house for a short while with your hubby in the first month. Take a breather and reconnect with your old self. Think of nothing about the baby while you are out and trust that your baby will be well-taken care of by your trusted ones while you are away.  I had trouble relaxing myself during my first born confinement period.  I had to be forced out of the house to relax and it certainly helped in improving my post-natal depression.  So, for the sake of yourself and the baby, have some time away from the baby occasionally.

10. Will I do a good job as a mum?

Of course! Do not doubt yourself! Post-natal blues may cause you to doubt your ability and natural mother instincts.  You must remember that you have taken good care of your baby while he is in your womb.  And now that he is out, he depends alot on you to grow up and be independent eventually. He needs your wisdom, calmness, to hear your voice, see your face, drink your milk and feel safe in your cuddle.  You must have a positive mindset to enjoy the parenting joy.  Hence, believe in your ability.  Mother instincts will help you along the way.  No one takes care of the baby better than you if you trust yourself.

What other questions do you have? Share with me on your experience!